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Creativity

Dream

June 18, 2026 by Emily Thiroux Leave a Comment

Dreams that come while sleeping come in an unlimited variety. They can be from memories, from desires, from sadness, from joy, or from and entirely unknown source. They range from terrifying to incredible happiness. While they can affect our lives in some ways, the more powerful dreams that we have come from while we are awake.

In the daylight we can actively dream about whatever we want to. We can create in our mind the life we would love to live, then go on to create that life. I dreamed when I was in college that I would be a writer. I planted that seed when I was in a writing class.  At the time, I didn’t judge that dream, and I didn’t dwell on it, but it remained in my mind occasionally reminding me to write a bit about something.

Ironically, before I did much writing, I was hired to teach a writing class at the community college. I learned much about writing, and about what not to write, by grading endless writing assignments. And I stared writing more myself. I’d dream in my journal about what I would love to do and how I loved to do whatever that was, and it frequently changed. And I loved teaching writing so much that I was hired to teach writing at a university.

One dream came true in an unexpected way. I had a representative of Prentice Hall Publishing drop by my office one day to convince me to order a book he was selling for my class. I told him he didn’t have anything I wanted. Startled, he said “What do you want?” I described to him how I was frequently the only person who was not from a different country or different culture.  All the books he offered were by old, white men. My students needed writing examples from a variety of people. He said “That’s just what we’ve be looking for! Will you write it for us?” I said yes, and my textbook writing career began.

That little seed I’d planted years before had started to grow without me even realizing it. I’ve gone on to write 5 more books after that, taught writing at a university for 30 years, and now I encourage people to write through their grief to bring them comfort and realize happiness.

What dreams have you dreamed that have come true? What dreams are you dreaming about now? Whatever your dreams are, write them in your journal and maybe even tell a friend. The more you focus on a dream, the more likely it is to come true. There is no limit to what to dream about. Just dream.

Dream bigger than you can ever imagine.

 

Loving and Living Your Way Through Grief

Grief and Happiness Handbook

Grief and Happiness Cards

Grief and Happiness weekly Free Gatherings

[email protected]

Dream Builder Life Coach

Life Master Consultantant

Filed Under: Change, Creativity, Grief, journaling, Loss, Self-Care, Support Tagged With: change, grief, grieving, happiness, healthy coping mechanisms, how to deal with grief, reclaiming your joy, self-care, support

It’s About Time

April 25, 2026 by Emily Thiroux

Taking a bite of a stale piece of bread is so disappointing. Going stale easily sneaks up on you, or actually, it snuck on me, without my noticing. Since my husband Jacques died 20 years ago and my husband Ron died 9 years ago, I’ve lost other relatives and friends too and became immersed in helping others deal with grief and find happiness at the same time. While I am thrilled to find my purpose in doing all that entailed, I realize I’ve become a bit of a bore.

In the last year I have started broadening my horizons. I love to write and continue to write my blog every week and write our Grief and Happiness Newsletter. I also facilitate our weekly writing group with help from my friends Judy and Phil. Yet I found myself yearning for freshness, and I am so glad I did. I attended a women’s retreat with Karen Drucker on Kaua’i. I spent a week with my dear friends Fontaine and Michael.

And my dear friend Charmin came to visit me on Maui. I attended to business at my Ambulance company in California. I went on a cruise to Alaska with old and new friends. I started attending a gathering of friends who paint watercolors together, and another group of friends who go to theatre and concerts together.

This year I am planning a fabulous concert with my great friend Rickie Byars in Maui and am planning a beautiful retreat with my good friend Michael Sudman on the Big Island of Hawaii. And Sadie Beil and I are ramping up for our next From Mouring to Light international summit on Zoom with great new guests and topics.

As I write this blog, I am flying back from Pacentro and Rome in Italy where I went to celebrate a big birthday with Sadie and meet some new, great friends: Greg, Mel, Pietro, Karen, and Will. Besides a delightful birthday party, we went on spontaneous adventures like visiting the snow, cooking great food together, discovering new coffee drinks, and best of all having deep, meaningful talks as we got to know each other while we lived together in a Medieval village on the side of a mountain! Pieotro, Sadie’s husband, introduced us to so much to see and we discovered Rome from an Italian’s perspective instead of like tourists.

I am sharing all this to encourage you to think about what you are doing. What have you always wanted to do? Who do you want to do something with? Where do you want to go?  I encourage you to write in your journal exploring these questions. I’ve got a concert, a retreat, and a summit I would like to see you come to. And the Grief and Happiness Alliance Nonprofit Organization is gearing up a membership drive we could use help with as well as other fun plans.

So, dream big. Make a plan. Create new experiences and make new friends! And have so much fun doing what you want to! You can always feel even better than you do right now!

 

Loving and Living Your Way Through Grief

Grief and Happiness Handbook

Grief and Happiness Cards

Grief and Happiness weekly Free Gatherings

[email protected]

Dream Builder Life Coach

Life Master Consultant

Filed Under: Change, Community, Creativity, Grief, Happiness, Self-Care, Someone to talk to, Support, Writing Tagged With: grieving, happiness, healthy coping mechanisms, how to deal with grief, reclaiming your joy, self-care, support, writing through grief

Writing Your Grief

April 10, 2026 by Emily Thiroux

Whenever I watch a movie or read a book, it seems like one of the themes is grief. We all deal with loss at times throughout our lives, so having grief show up in books and movies is logical. Since dealing with and teaching about grief is a major part of my life, it’s also logical that I see it everywhere.

Recently on a long flight I was looking for a movie to watch, and I chose Eleanor the Great. I didn’t know what it was about, and of course it turned out to be about grief.  Eleanor was a 94-year-old woman who was sharing an apartment with another woman who she had known for many years. Both women were widows.  Her roommate was troubled with nightmares and Eleanor had been trying to comfort her. Before her roommate died, she told Eleanor about an experience that because she and her brother were Jewish, they had been sent via train to a death comp. On the trip, her brother jumped off to get away, so she jumped too. After the train was out of site, she started searching for her brother. When she finally found him, he was riddled with 14 bullet holes. In her nightmares, she had been dreaming about finding him over again every night.

Because her roommate died, Eleanor daughter insisted that she come from Florida to live with her in New York.  She was not happy as she didn’t have any friends there, so her daughter signed her up for a singing class at a local Jewish community center. She wasn’t Jewish and didn’t like the class she signed up for, so she wandered into a story telling class where holocaust survivors told their stories. The group leader called on her to tell her story, and since she didn’t have one, she told her roommate’s.

Eleanor started mentoring a student who was observing the writing class and they became friends. The girl was dealing with the recent sudden death of her mother in an accident, so Eleanor was teaching her the importance of writing about grief. Ultimately the truth was discovered that Eleanor told her roommate’s experience instead of her own. All the people involved realized that their stories needed to be told and they needed to be true.

As I watched this story unfold, I could understand how avoiding communication concerning grief was hurtful. Most of the misunderstanding wouldn’t have occurred if people didn’t fear expressing their truth and if they took time to listen to the stories of others instead of focusing of hiding their own pain.

I suggest that people write about their grieving experiences. Have you written your grief story? Who are you grieving now? Who do you know who is grieving now? How can you communicate better or listen better? You are likely to discover that the more you write about or speak about your grief, the less often you will feel a need to. Then you will be able to carry your love safely in your heart where is can comfort you the rest of your life.

 

Loving and Living Your Way Through Grief

Grief and Happiness Handbook

Grief and Happiness weekly Free Gatherings

[email protected]

Dream Builder Life Coach

Life Master Consultant

Filed Under: Change, Creativity, Grief, Self-Care, Writing Tagged With: change, grieving, writing through grief

What Are You Thinking?

April 4, 2026 by Emily Thiroux

Do you pay attention to your thinking? Letting your thoughts run wild is so easy to do. I just misspelled every word in the last sentence and had to go back to correct them. This caused a change of direction in my thoughts. I was thinking so quickly that my typing fingers couldn’t keep up. Then I looked out the window and started thinking about how all the birds in the yard seemed to be in pairs, so what does a bird do when its partner dies? That thought took me down a rabbit trail of ideas until I realized that it didn’t have anything to do with what I was writing here, so I started thinking again.

Does your brain do this too? The challenge of controlling your thoughts is something we all deal with. Did you know that your thoughts are energy? When you are tired or listless, chances are that your thoughts reflect that. They just float in different directions and don’t help you much. But when you are fully rested and energized you can be at your highest creativity. If you are struggling with your job and think there must be something better you can do, if you just wallow in that thought, you won’t find an answer. However, if you realize that you truly desire a change, you can use that positive energy to discover what your next step is and take that step.

What does this have to do with grief? Often while grieving, our thoughts float in so many directions that we get confused. When that happens, moving forward is difficult. When that happens, try writing about your thoughts. Write at the top of the page what is bothering you most like finances, caring for your children, dating, being able to keep you house clean, getting a job, being lonely, or feeling sad. Then set a timer for 10 minutes to write everything you can think about that one subject. When you finish, read what you wrote and notice what stands out to you the most.

After you read what you wrote, choose which of the things you wrote about is your biggest issue. Now write again, this time about the issue on the list that troubles you the most. Now write a list of what you can do or where you can find help with this issue. Then do something positive and constructive about this issue. This writing technique works. The process of writing about things helps bring organization to your issues which allows you to then address your issues methodically.

When you just think about all the issues that are bothering you, this leads to confusion and difficulty in acting on any of these issues. When you use a formulaic writing technique like this, you can hold on to your ideas and use them to help you move forward. I also highly recommend daily journal writing to help you retain your ideas which can so easily slip away from you while you are grieving.

Get out your pen and write! Start today!

 

 

Loving and Living Your Way Through Grief

Grief and Happiness Handbook

Grief and Happiness Cards

Grief and Happiness weekly Free Gatherings

[email protected]

Dream Builder Life Coach

Life Master Consultant

Filed Under: Change, Creativity, Grief, Happiness, Intentions, Memories, Self-Care, Support, Writing Tagged With: how to deal with grief, practicing gratitude, reclaiming your joy, self-care, writing through grief

Happiness — Pass it On!

February 26, 2026 by Emily Thiroux

Today there seems to be lots of bad or negative news circulating.

Here is some good news for you to brighten your day!

  1. I get lots of very tasty apple bananas from my trees. What fresh fruit are you enjoying?
  2. My friend Michael Reed just published a book, The Owl and the Ladybug, a gentle, beautifully illustrated story created to help children begin making sense of grief, sadness, or loss in a way that feels safe, calm, and reassuring. I am happy to see this special book is available to help 4- to 10-year-olds. What’s the best, positive book you have read recently?
  3. I just went with friends to see an excellent production of the play The Revolutionists at the Maui Academy of Performing Arts. I loved being able to see a production so beautifully done. What is something you have done lately that you really enjoyed?

Join me in spreading some joy!

  1. Email the answers to my questions to me to bring me some happiness! emilyemail
  2. Write a list of three items of good news you are enjoying today. Send your list to at least three of your friends. I’d love to be one of them!
  3. In your journaling every day, write 3 things that make you happy.

Before you share something negative with your friends, stop and think of something beautiful or positive you could share instead.

Let’s start a Happiness Revolution together! Let’s see how many smiles we can inspire!

Filed Under: Change, Creativity, Gratitude, Grief, Happiness, Joy, Love, Self-Care, Support Tagged With: friends, Gratitude, grief, happiness, how to deal with grief, love, practicing gratitude, reclaiming your joy, self-care, writing through grief

Holiday Letters

December 3, 2025 by Emily Thiroux

I always loved getting holiday letters from friends and family. Often it is the only time I heard from people I cared about each year. Over the years, the numbers of cards have decreased and often the letters are brief and impersonal. I am a big proponent of staying in touch with people I love, but I know I could do better. Ron and I wrote a holiday letter together each year, and my first year without him, I decided to write a letter on my own.  Here is the sharing I put on my Christmas card the year Ron died:

Christmas this year is a time of reflection for me. In a year of deep experiences, I’ve learned so              much.

  • I learned the peace of living only in the moment.
  • I learned the joy of spending all my time with Ron.
  • I learned the love of being surrounded by our Ohana and loving friends and family.
  • I learned the gratitude we have for the perfect care given by Hospice.
  • I learned the beauty of Hawaiian culture in the memorial service for Ron on the Beach.
  •  I learned the strength I didn’t realize I have in looking forward to each new day.This holiday season and next year, I wish you peace, joy, love, gratitude, beauty, and strength.

 

I like what I wrote that year. Reading it again showed me how much I have learned and changed since eight years ago. And It made me realize how much I love the tradition of staying in touch. I keep my holiday card list updated, and I don’t delete addresses of people who don’t keep in touch with me because I still think of them and would love to hear from them too!

I am in the prosses of putting my holiday letter together for this year and am sharing with you a fill in the blanks template as an idea for you to create your own letters. Here you go!

This year has brought me (or us, or our family) ______________________

As I reflect, I realize that:

      • I learned that ____________________________________________________
      • I experienced joy by _______________________________________________
      • I love that ________________________________________________________
      • I saw beauty in ____________________________________________________
      • I accomplished __________________________________________________
      • I found peace by _________________________________________________
      • I am grateful for __________________________________________________
      • I love you because _______________________________________________
      • I will keep in better touch with you by ______________________________

This holiday season and next year, I wish you peace, joy, love, gratitude, beauty, and                                strength.

Feel free to change or add anything you’d like. Have fun with this. I hope you will send letters or cards to at least some of your loved ones, and of course, I would love to get something from you!

Keeping in touch, especially with people who are grieving, can make a huge difference to people you care about.

Happy Holidays!

 

 

Loving and Living Your Way Through Grief

Grief and Happiness Handbook

Grief and Happiness Cards

Grief and Happiness weekly Free Gatherings

[email protected]

Dream Builder Life Coach

Life Master Consultant

 

 

Filed Under: Change, Creativity, Gratitude, Happiness, Holidays, journaling, Love, Memories, Self-Care, Support Tagged With: Gratitude, grieving, happiness, healthy coping mechanisms, holidays, Joy, memories, practicing gratitude, self-care, writing through grief

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